Mid-30's guy travels to Thailand a few times. He is not very confident with the women (which I witnessed with my own eyes as he was a friend from same city in home country) and even found it a challenge to meet a woman in the Nana Plaza area.

On travels up to Isaan region he propositions a woman in a beer bar - 1000b for short-time in his hotel room. Not an unreasonable offer in such a bar. She -according to him - was offended that he thought her a prostitute. Stammering to apologize he then reworked his offer. Through her female friend as translator - he sweetened the deal that he would be willing to marry her and assume all of her financial obligations.

Yes, you are reading this correctly - this offer of marriage was made the SAME night he met her - and had not yet even slept with her yet!

Agreeing on the terms, they retire to his room where an evening of - according to him - unspectacular sex ensued.

Within 2 weeks he travelled to Bangkok and got a Thai marriage license. Shortly after, he flew back to N America - prematurely torn from his bride.

According to him, he was sending her between $1500 - $2000 Canadian dollars a month - every month. It seems he needed to pay off her house and that of her mother, both in dire financial straits. And also, members of extended family (nices and sisters) needed financial aid. $$$$$$$

Of course all of his friends are aghast and telling him in no uncertain terms that this is utter insanity. He has no legal title to the property on which he is paying the mortages. His income is modest in NAmerica - and his employment is in a remote area - working in very difficult weather and conditions in industry. Working hard in isolation and sending a large portion of his income to his wife in Thailand.

It takes him 5 months or more to save enough cash to return to see his wife - the only comfort in NAmerica is when on an occasional weekend, he removes his wedding ring and hides in his pocket, drinks to the point of oblivion and tries (and sometimes even succeeds) to seduce +200 lb. women in the bar.

At long last - he returns for a much awaited 2 month trip to Thailand. However, sadly he is forced to return 4 weeks early as he has 'run out of money' while there.

Why?

Because his "wife didnt' budget properly and needed to pay a one time large expense" during his visit. He exhausts his trip savings and returns home broke and in credit card debt. In fact, borrows money from his wife to travel back to Bangkok. Perhaps a good thing - as in his emails from Thailand he claims to be fighting constantly with his wife; tells of her temper tantrums and how they have absolutely "nothing in common".

Perhaps sanity has finally prevailed you think?

Not so fast.

He continues to send money (roughly 8 times the average monthly income for that area of Thailand) and further finances a beauty salon for her. And will complain to anyone still willing to listen about how hard he has it. He describes his work conditions as 'incarceration', the conditions polluted and dismal.

I tell him he is a fool. But what do I know about love and Thai culture? (note: I have been to Thailand 3 trips)

Without a sympathetic ear at home, he complains on some expat farang bulletin boards seeking sympathy and advice - but,.... doesn't take the advice. And he continures to wire money to her - by conservative calculation over $25,000 so far,..

5 months again, he has scraped together enough cash to head back to Thailand. Days before departure he sends 1/3 of his trip budget to the wife. It seems she has not been able to to stick to her budget and needed more cash immediately. $$$$$$$

However, it would all be worth it. Because upon arrival she greeted him passionately and the heavens shook with the intensity of their lovemaking; the angels wept at the beauty and purity of their true love.

Well, not exactly.

It seems that (and I quote)
"My wife has lost her sex drive,...when she was trying to catch me,it was high,now its horrible.Thers(sic) always a reason,migraine,sore stomach,no sleep,ect.I haven't seen her for 5 months,I thought she would be all over me."

Unfairly treated, he sought the advice of wise men; Professors of WBU, men of profound wisdom and deep compassion. And they responded with the truth, the wisdom of the ages.

Which, the subject of our story,..inexpliqueably discarded and summarily dismissed : "I came into a little money and low (sic) and behold my wife became sweeter." Problem solved!

Perhaps true love will conquer all. And perhaps he will return once again to an expat farang message board and once again seek the advice of the elders, another tale of heartbreak to be told.

"Oh ok then....when 'the problem' pops up again...do post it and ask us again." replied a Heineken guzzling ape.

The end to this little story has not yet been written - would anyone care to predict how this human drama will play out?

sincerely and inimitably,
Johnny Rocco

The two parts of a man's body that demand the most blood are the brain and the p*nis. Unfortunately He didn't give us enough blood to operate both at the same time.

You are his friend, he won't listen to you,and won't listen to ALL his other friends, he asked advice on a farang based forum(his choice), he hasn't listened to us....yet...what can you do eh..?

and i don't drink Heiny.

and i don't drink Heiny.

I thought his name was Johnny

Summed up nicely,he is the type of prick that continues to give Thai women the ideas ands dreams that we are all stupid!
Cannot feel sorry for the dude,there is enough literature,books,forums out there for a intelligent farang to budget,be aware of pitfalls,see a sponging Thai.
I believe his IQ is in the range of 0/20.nuff said

Whatever will be ,will be!Some people are perpetual victims.He is obviously a maladjusted individual that probably gets off on any attention,even sympathy.

He needs a mental health adjustment and has needed it for a long time,possibly unsalvagable.It is a sad sight to see,but vultures have to eat too!

perfectly put stan,

I thought that I would be lambasted by some of the more sympathetic forum members for my rant.

Truth be told, I am not immune to the charms of Isaan beauties. Mind you, I have stopped short of marrying one after a week long vacation. I am more partial to Filipinas - there isn't so much of a cultural gap and that blend of Asian grace and latin fire,...

The hero of the story has told me many stories of being scammed on his travels - oh,..where to start....

re: "Cannot feel sorry for the dude,there is enough literature,books,forums out there for a intelligent farang to budget,be aware of pitfalls,see a sponging Thai. "

The irony is that he loaned me a copy of the classic "Private Dancer" and freely gives advice (????) to other Thai travelers. "Be careful of getting scammed!"

I pointed out (while drinking beer and trading stories) that he was not taking the advice that he was freely giving.

"But my girl isn't a bar girl" he explained smugly - confident that he had demonstrated that his own situation was COMPLETELY different.

"Oh?" I asked innocently,..."Where did you say you met her?"

silent pause...

"In a bar"

"Game, set - match!",..as I sipped from my heifeweizen.

Oh,..the stories I could tell.

No comment, no fool like an old fool and he is nopt yet that old, but ignore your elders at your peril also comes to mind.
I suppose he is happy .............not

At first I said:
"People can do whatever they want with their lives. It is your money and you can do whatever you want as long as you aren't hurting anyone else."

Later, after hearing too much whining:
"I have no sympathy for you. You have lost the right to complain if you are not willing to listen to any advice."

and lastly:
"I don't want to hear anymore of this nonsense. This is below my level of tolerance for stupidity and don't want to be associated with it."

and the world keeps spinning

Filipinas have their cultural differences also,but IMO,not as many that areradically different from our culture!Most speak English and Tagalag,as they are taught in English in their school system.

They are very religious in general.Catholic predominantly and get very involved in Relgious days and events.They also support family in the P.I.!

But ,in general,they are more intelligent and their education system is vastly superior,allowing for more diverse topic conversation!

I think Thais have a higher degree of tolerance and patience with us though and Thailand is a much safer environment to live in than the Phillipines!

Your ''friends''actions and words confirm that he gets off on sympathy and attention!IMO,he is pathetic and my no means a ''hero''!

That is incredable.What an earth is this man thinking!I also heard a story about similar situation.This farang approached some Thai tart,He asked her to sleep with him.She said"No I dont sleep with man!" He asked her three times.In the end she said alright.Buy me new car I can do!
Maybe she was joking I dont know,but he said to her OK I see you tomorrow we go buy!
He actually bought her this car!
I was actually hesitant to believe this story up to now.But reading this topic I think It is possible.
It is amazing what people will do for ...( and thats what its all about)! SEX!
I spose this fool thought he was in love.Yes "love is blind".
So many thai women will do this.They dont give a sh1t about the farang,just bleed him dry.If money runs out, Its "On yer bike" I actually know someone who has a farang send money.When he comes to see her, Her Thai b/f slings his hook.when the farangs goes back.Thai b/f returnes for his %!
Many have a string of b/f's and aThai b/f on the side as well. They will say anything! Sly, crafty,and devious.
This "Oh I like old man" ,"I like fat man". "I dont like Thai man", The only reason is the poor bast...s got no money!
There are many women here are as hard as nails.It takes some time to find a good heart person here.
All the time fools like mentioned here do these things sending money in vast amount's will continue dont have respect for them, They know they are fools themselves!
I have a partner here,now one year together.She is wonderful.makes me happy everyday!
But I always keep my defences up!She is Thai.They all have the same system,but just in a small scale. Pity really.But I have been bitten too many times!

don't want to be negative, however I smell a windup. If not I apologize but this is really nothing new.

I have been here long enough to lose my empathy and sympathy for the falang that ALLOWS himself to be taken!There are to many resources for information available to these guys.
To overspend,pay to much for this or that,is one thing,but some of the things guys have done,like buying a car,house,marriage etc. to be with a woman,is beyond belief and do not deserve any solace or great concern!

These guys are no different than the twats that open businesses without any expertise or knowledge about the environment and location factors.They deserve their rewards and lessons!

I think most of us expats have paid some ''dues'' for our cultural and environmental ignorance,It is a matter of intelligence,or lack of ,that some people seemingly lose the plot here!

Like I said earlier,the vultures have to eat to!I guess some idiots need to be that meal in the food chain!
How does one blame the vultures?

banpaeng: I am unfamiliar with the expression "smell a windup". I can assure the facts to my story are correct .

I have no problem with the idea that a farang gives a woman money. We all have bills to pay and I don't mind giving it to good looking, friendly Thai girls 1000 b at a time.

The advantage (I tell to younger dudes) is that after the 1000b - she and I are even. She may make no claims for a future or that I owe any emotional attachments. Afterall, i want to meet another young lady the very next evening.

I just don't believe in sending them money - with the assumption that they will not sleep with any other farang in return fior my financial support.

And, I don't blame the Thai girl. It can be a tough, ruthless world out there, trying to make enough to eat and pay rent. And promises broken on all sides. I don't mind them asking,..I just say "I am happy to give you some baht,....when I see you in person."

In fact I will lay it on the bed while she is taking her post-boomboom shower. But I will not wire her cash to put gas in your bf's motorcycle.