For those of you who know me, I have NOT been hit between the eyes with this. I was merely reading the other day about the custom of Thai daughters receiving land upon marrying and that the husband was obligated to pay a dowery to the parents.

Does anyone know anything about this custom? What size dowery is considered adequate? What happens if the happy couple decides not to use the land and live somewhere else?

Just wondering ...

Sinsot is part of the Thai marriage deal, its a showing and giving of a large anount of cash, some gold too.

Its not applicable if the girl has been married before, or has a baby.

If googled, lots of info on sinsot will come up.

Any idea on how the amount is calculated?

Thanks for the info. I'll look it up.

Mark,I don't think there is a definitive answer to the question of sinsod and the amounts.As in everything else,there are different expectations put on falangs versus Thais,especially in the lower class(Isaan Thais from villages)!17 years ago,my wifes sinsod was 10,000 baht and her father was the major rice land farmer in his village!5 years later ,one of her brothers paid 100,000 baht,but he moved into his wifes family home and took over their school bus(truck)business!5 years ago,her youngest brother was trying to raise 100,000 for the girl he wanted to marry,but she was a city girl he had met in college!She finally went forthe guy with the money!

The basic Thai rules are that if she is not a virgin,no sinsod!Most Thai men do not marry divorced women or women with children anyway!

For falangs,the Thai rules don't seem to apply!Sinsod is expected!

It basically depends on the G/F's family attitude and her relationship with them.It is not a ''fits all'' for the families!Many factors figure into the equation of ''Face'',such as how many falangs have married girls from the village,how much falang money has been invested in property around the village through the working daughters and the individual greed level of the family involved!

It is something that should be negotiated by the G/F over a long period of time and with discussions with you.If she is not a virgin,the sinsod involved should be mostly for show,returned to you and your wife after the ceremony!

As far as the family deeding land to your wife,IMO,that is a trap to get you to build in the village and what ever is invested in the village will stay there if things don't work out!It would take a special family in a special village for me to built in the village to early in the relationship.I think it takes about 4-5 years into the relationship before it should even be a consideration!

Thanks for that explanation, Stan!

I did some reading since I posted and found most of what you described. As you know, I am not planning to buy -- renting seems to be the best route for me at this time.

As usual, I have learned quite a bit more by reading UdonMap.com!

cost me 100,000 baht to the mum and 10 baht gold to the missus,so from what I understood that the money to the mother as she brought up the daughter over all the years and money to the missus so that if I ever moved on then she has a starting point ie cashing it in to help her into she meets a new man or have I been 'done like a kipper'.
Do not know the going rates between marriage of same sexes though.

100,000 baht seems to be a common amount in the things I've read, but 40,000 baht, 50,000 baht and 70,000 have also creeped in there.

As has been explained, the Thai custom is sin sodt. A dowry is expected if you marry a Sino-Thai since it is a Chinese custom. Not all farangs are expected to pay sin sodt since the tradition is similar to that in the west. If the lady has been married previously and has a child, no sin sodt is expected.

A friend of mine from New York is going to marry a young lady from a small village near Udon, but he absolutely refuses to pay sin sodt. He has also made it clear that he does not expect relatives to live with them or to ask for financial assistance at any time. They will live in Chiang Mai and he finds it more attractive and comfortable as a city than Udon Thani. This is fine with her and her family.

I have heard, and read on other forums, of farangs paying 1-3 million baht sinsodt, and that does not even include the new cellphone, car and house.

Up to you.

My wife's youngest sister was married last week in a small rice farming village about 90 km East of Nong Khai. The families are from neighboring rice farming villages and neither family has a large income. The dowry was negotiated by the parents and came out to be 110,000. I got the impression that this was not a particularly high price.

rickfarang wrote:My wife's youngest sister was married last week in a small rice farming village about 90 km East of Nong Khai. The families are from neighboring rice farming villages and neither family has a large income. The dowry was negotiated by the parents and came out to be 110,000. I got the impression that this was not a particularly high price.

Was any of it returned to the marrying cuople after the ceremony?

Does anybody remember the article in the news last year about the Chinese -Thais renting elaborate gold and money displays for sin sod ceremonies?

BKKSTAN wrote:Was any of it returned to the marrying cuople after the ceremony?

I have read some accounts in different places where some or all of the money was returned to the groom/couple. I also read an account where the announced amount at the wedding ceremony was HIGHER than what was actually given in order to bring more favor upon the groom and the bride's family.

It appears that it is common for there to be no sin sot if the bride has been married before or has a child.

Dowry is according what she is worth. This is calculated according to her virginity, age, looks, education, job, social status, family's rank in society, etc, etc.

Dowry is not expected for divorced women, mothers, excons, orphans and prostitutes(bargirls/freelancers). I only know Farangs who paid dowry to this group. No Thai men will pay dowry to this class since Thais think this is for fools and morons and will be laughed at especially if married to prostitutes.

If she is farmers daughter with her virginity intact, expect 50-100K baht.
If she has college education, expect 100-200K baht, middle-class girl 200K+. If she comes from rich family 1,000,000+, etc,etc.
For an average respectable girl expect about 100K.

Thai men will pay dowry accordingly but Farangs usually overpay because they feel inadequate and makes themselves feel good and have pay to get her attitude.

I usaully advise 50-100K for nice respectible girl since she and her family will ask for help for many years to come.

We are not rich,but I want at least 2 M sin sod for our daughter,4-5 M would be even better! I doubt that it will happen because she doesn't want ''an old falang'',she wants a young handsome Thai or falang!Since she is a beautiful ''dark skinned''Isaan,she won't be marrying a non-Thai Asian,but there will be plenty tuk tuk drivers around

My motive is to see that the fella that breaks her cherry is capable of providing her a lifestyle she has become accustomed to!Bottomline is,she will make the decision!We will probably be supporting a bigger family

SanBorn wrote:Dowry is according what she is worth. This is calculated according to her virginity, age, looks, education, job, social status, family's rank in society, etc, etc.

Dowry is not expected for divorced women, mothers, excons, orphans and prostitutes(bargirls/freelancers). I only know Farangs who paid dowry to this group. No Thai men will pay dowry to this class since Thais think this is for fools and morons and will be laughed at especially if married to prostitutes.

If she is farmers daughter with her virginity intact, expect 50-100K baht.
If she has college education, expect 100-200K baht, middle-class girl 200K+. If she comes from rich family 1,000,000+, etc,etc.
For an average respectable girl expect about 100K.

Thai men will pay dowry accordingly but Farangs usually overpay because they feel inadequate and makes themselves feel good and have pay to get her attitude.

I usaully advise 50-100K for nice respectible girl since she and her family will ask for help for many years to come.

SanBorn, that seems to be some good info. It certainly makes sense to me. So what you're saying is that a divorced farmer's daughter with a child or a farmer's daughter with an out-of-wedlock child gets zero in both cases?

Although there is alot of jealousy involved because of the ''richness''of the falang husband and the probable raised living standards she will have,there is a ''shame '' factor involved that she is marrying a falang!The sin sod is therefore a''face saver''for proposed mixed marriages!