Often,as i am posting on the forum,the wife will come over and ask about the members,who they are,what they do etc.She is curious about the wives and is amazed that not one of the four hundred odd members has met a wife in a bar.
Managed to get the wife away from business on Friday and went to Udon for the day.During the day,at Makro,Tesco,etc every farang was obviously with an ex or current BG.I cannot think of anyone on the forum who would admit to such,so is the stigma that strong or is it that we have all met our wives/GFs in other ways?If so who were the dozens of farang with the women in the leopard print tops and short pink skirts and i'm not talking young girls either.(forties)Do guys with BG wives not post on forums for some psycological reason?

I know a couple of local guys with BG wives and they are quite happy to discuss how they met in Phuket/Pattaya.Maybe as they are manual workers of relatively lower intelligence the stigma does not bother them.Does greater intelligence/social status bring it to the fore?

If you find this post intrusive please ignore it and not suggest i need even more therapy. Just got a nosey wife.

I think the answer is obvious. If you have the intelligence to hold a discourse on a forum, then you would know not to look for a wife in a brothel!!

businessman wrote:and not suggest i need even more therapy.

Ok I won't

But I think the answer is obvious too, for different reasons.

Few farang are going to say "I married a prostitute"; it can be dressed up how you like as "bar girl" or whatever, but that, or worse, is the normal English word for it. It does'nt matter if she is a good woman or a good wife, among other farang I would imagine they know they are going to be laughed at a bit, not by all, but by many, behind their backs. People may well not want to say that on here for the same reasons.

Likewise, Thais look down on bar girls, for the same reasons, and I guess have the same attitude when they see such a couple

If however these 2 men are happy to discuss it, perhaps it does not suggest lower intelligence (manual workers may have lacked the opportunity for education, but it does not IMHO mean lack of intelligence) but just that they do not give a damn what others think about their personal lives.

They are happy about it, it does not hurt me directly, although it perhaps adds to the stereotyping of farang in Thailand which is something that annoys me a bit.

Marrying a bar girl is not something I would want to do,but thats just me,

John

This is an observation and observation only. I am not putting anyone into this. Just a true observation.

2003 we went to Nong Khai to scout it out for retirement. By reading the Danish Baker site, it sounded like they were into community projects and actually made it sound quite good.

The second day we were there we went to the Danish Bakers place and at 9AM in the morniong there was a group of guys sitting around with a couple of women. All of the guys were drinking beer. Came back by at 5pm and all were there except 1 guy and added a few women. Nothing wrong with that it is just not my style.

Another observation is that the folks on here have a different life. Ray bowls and bike rides(Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man). See where a few of you guys play golf. See where some of you work. This is more of the community that I feel will suit my type of living. Sure go out for a beer but every day is a bit much for me.

As stated in another thread, I or we cannot worry about what others think or we should not have married multiracial. This is something you will have to deal with it and it does not matter what country you are in.
My father in law thought at first all I did by marrying my wife was to take her to the states to work on a farm hearding animals. It took a bit but made my headway into the family and village. My treatment today in the village is so different it is hard to describe. Almost think I am accepted and then run in the redneck of the village and he does not say anything. Just crosses the road and walks on the other side and give them go to hell looks. Surprising we went to the Chinese Mall yesterday in Houston Texas to eat a bowl of Go Theo. Been going there for years and they seated a Asian couple next to us. Nothing doing but they had to move. Got that same look. After a few years you know it and move on.

Another question you ask is why the ladies that you know are wives still act like that the only thing I can say is the husband is there at the same place and acting like that. It is the old thing of what is good for the goose is good for the gander.

Thinking out of the box so to speak

From what I have seen opposite the plaza some of the expatriates have married bargirls and brought them down to their level.

Nice one TC.

I

very well said Jimbo.

I think the term "bar girls" taken by farangs to imply prostitute is totally wrong. After all, we have many bars in UK and the ladies are called "bar maids" which describes exactly their profession. I have never been aware of any offering sex for sale. Here in Thailand, I frequent a bar where I have got to know a very pretty young lady, she used to work in a dept store, but when her baby came along she had no one to take care of it during the day. The hours of work in a bar suited. Her husband(Thai) comes home from work just before 6Pm, can then take care the baby while she goes working.She had no intention of offering a sexual service, and in fact lost two jobs because of this. Then a sensible bar owner, realised it was an assett to just have a pretty girl around the place and gave her a job. Now she will sit and talk to the customers, gets 3or 4 girl drinks a night, the guy stays in the bar buying drinks instead of being hustled off to some hotel by a lady just interested to get her fee for the evening.But and this is a big but. The farang customers automatically assume she is available, because she is "A BAR GIRL"
Her Thai husband picks her up at midnight on his motorcycle to take her home.This led to me having a heated argument with one guy, who had spent nearly the entire evening trying to get her off, despite her saying no, and when he saw her go with the Thai, started mouthing, why she go with him, he can't give her money like me and proceeded to open his wallet to me.His use of "Dirty little bitch" flipped me I'm afraid.
My point is obvious I think!!

Mr. Valentine< I salute you.

This has been my point all along. RESPECT

The guy must have not had any for himself or anyone else. You know you can't buy your way to happiness.

Thanks.

i'm of the open minded set and try not to pass judgement on others, as i'm sure many would not approve of some of my life's lessons and adventures. i try to respect all, no matter what profession they are in as long as they are honest and treat others with the same respect. it's very easy to misjudge those who have had to make difficult decisions we don't understand, and luckily have never had to make. it's hard enough wearing my own shoes, i really wouldn't want to walk is someone else's or judge what i can't imagine.

as far as farangs having or acknowledging origins of their significant others meeting place or prior work enviroment, i like the don't know, don't ask policy. i make a point not to ask where a couple met, if they want to offer, that's fine, but i won't ask, that's their perogative to offer or not, and their right to privacy if their choice.

Very good point and very good posting Val. Yes, I know some girls who work as cashiers in bars, but only that. They don't go with customers. Also, some students who work singing in cafes, to assist in funding their education.

Assumption can be a very dangerous thing and shows narrow mindedness.

how do you know what your wives did before you met them , theyre not going own up to being bargirls , are they??

youre judging a book by its cover , just because a girl likes wearing pink shorts or leopard print top doesnt mean they are bar girls .

i bet if your wife wore pink tight shorts - you wouldnt mind .

your wives obviously dont keep up with the fashions .

are you all so intelligent on this forum , you all sit on thrones

Oh dear Mr nicey, gone into reverse mode, have you?You were doing so well