valentine, no need to be nervous, but i can understand why, after reading some of the stuff in these forums.

at the end of the day very little comes between me and my hard earned cash, i've had enough relationships to have a reasonable handle on women(although still much to learn i'm sure).
i'm asking these questions because iv'e never been at this stage of relationship (with a thai) and i don't want to ofend her or her family and i don't want to be the one who sets a new standard of stupidity(especialy with money).

i think i've read most of the relationships threads but if there is something you think i may have missed then point it out, cheers
a

abler2 wrote:hi, john
your last paragraph, hits the nail on the head, i have several good friends with thai wives living in ireland and england plus knowledge of a few from the thai community there, they are all, without exception useless with money, absolutely no regard for the priorities like bills ect, but they may well splashout regularly on brand name goods ect.(this includes my g/f)
back to my subject, my g/f family are reasonably well off, maybe the most comfortable thai family i have met, with several small restaurant business/stalls or whatever you call them with excess money to blow on what i would think are luxuries. i'll also add that her daddy is a police man but she lives with the aunties and cousins.

Current quote for marriage is 1million bts, what do you think???? although i might well be able to afford it, it certaily is a "bitter pill" to hand over that sort of money.
will i be better off offering to buying a house for her for us to live in for example??????
a

Well abler 2, I think only you can answer that question.
Can you live with the fact that you have bought a woman? I could not, but I know many if not most farang have done so. You know what buying a woman is the definition of I am sure.
But morals and culture aside, I get the feeling that although you have been with this lady for some significant periods, it appears that you really don't know her well. What is her next plan? What does she intend for you? And you for her? Life in Thailand? Life in the UK? Would she get a visa? Has she travelled overseas with another farang before? If so, it may not make it easier for you to get a visa for her. And if, just supposing, that after the million is paid and you get married, what then? Will the grandad get sick and need a million baht operation etc?
Sure, buying a house with the million would be a better idea. Though she might not agree. But that would give you no additional security anyway as it can only be in her name alone, and she can sell it or kick you out at will. She may expect you to front with another million for a house as the first million is for her family. Again, in asking this question you seem to confirm that you have had very little discusion with her, which appears to confirm that you know her very little.
Not knowing you or the lady but having gut feelings, my advice would be to make an excuse about the money, ie, its in an investment account and will take a minimum period of say, 9 months to be released, and try and guage her sincerity over that period. She may dump you on the spot.
In summary, you are about to commit to a culture and thinking that you appear to know little of. Surely this is a warning. And remember that once you are married she can borrow and include you in the liability as you would be her husband. Are you scared yet?
And anyone can be a policeman, so don't take that as a statement of integrity. In many cases here in Thailand, it is the opposite. And policeman may only be getting paid 6,000 per month, and having to buy his own equipment such as gun etc. And street stalls may make little if anything.
Ok, thats my bit.
Again, best of luck!

This may be the thread that Val referred to.

http://www.udonmap.com/udonthaniforum/v ... .php?t=579

Lots of oppinions there.

Brian

Ive been thinking ,dangerous accupation but there you go, a I year O visa requires no money in thai bank etc, so question to forum . can you change from a retirment O/a visa to a one year O visa ONCE YOU HAVE AN O/a. and if so what are the pittfalls of the one year O ?

aj wrote:Ive been thinking ,dangerous accupation but there you go, a I year O visa requires no money in thai bank etc, so question to forum . can you change from a retirment O/a visa to a one year O visa ONCE YOU HAVE AN O/a. and if so what are the pittfalls of the one year O ?

aj

One year ' non o' visa requires evidence of marriage, address book, and certified evidence of 400,000 in the bank sourced from overseas, or certified evidence of 40,000 per month arriving in the Kingdom. Also as said in a previous posting, some immigration offices illegally demand both, ie, 400,000 plus 40,000 per month. In addition you go through a lengthly interview with both you and your spouse, and you must also convinvve the officer that you can come up with the same money next year. They then send it to BKK for approval, wich is usually late in arriving back, so you might find it takes 3 trips to immigration to get your visa.
The exception to the money requirement is that if you happen to female. If so, then money is not an issue, as it is presumed that your Thai husband will support you. LOL. So wear a dress and see what happens!
You may be confused with 'non o' visas issued outside Thailand. Some offices do issue these for one year without evidence of money, but they are multiple entry '90' day visas, that give you a total of one year, and not One year visas per sec.

John.

if you love her , you will pay one million baht dowry , one million baht = ฃ15,000 , if you can afford this amount of money .
you will be welcomed by the whole village community and of course your adopted thai family , for you will be part of your wifes family , you will equally be responsible for enhancing your new families future .
your life will also be enhanced , your wife will show you unconditional love and if you decide to start a family , your life will further be enhanced .
i suggest that you go ahead with your marriage but strongly recommend that you apply for your wifes visa back to ireland , your wife will eventually be granted " two year wife visa " , she will experience your culture and discover that life in farang land is not easy .
then she may be more careful with money . some thai girls will take advantage if a westerner starts splashing his money around just in case they dont see the westerners again .
some thai girls may not get many opportunities with generous westerners like your self .
i have met many beautiful thai girls on my visits to thailand , i try to treat each one as special as the other .
many come from north east thailand and have lived poor lives , to meet a good farng is a blessing but many good farangs make promises they may not be able to keep .
i wish you luck in the future .
follow your heart and you may come up trumps

to all
many many interesting points and points of view, i read the above mentioned thread, very interesting!!!
at the end of the day, many would say that 'love is free' and of course it is.
I think that a frank conversation with the lady in question is needed, i'd be delighted to relieve her family of some of their finantial burdons, and pay for the wedding and party ect.. but alas i don't have an endless supply of money to just be throwing away(on maybe nothing).
a.